Saturday, August 28, 2010

A Warm Heart Could Lead to a Hot Ass

Georgia has one of the biggest hearts I've ever seen. She oozes with compassion, love, and is by nature a healer. These are admirable traits and I know I'm blessed to have her in my life.

We are very new to "this thing we do" and I'll have to admit I sometimes feel a little confused and a bit conflicted when dealing with heart versus mind issues. I know it is a natural conflict, this battle between heart and mind and often it is a fine line we walk in trying to do the right thing. Sometimes the mind gets the heart in trouble but I think more often than not the heart gets the mind (and possibly the ass) in trouble.

Georgia recently met a new friend. A single mother in need. Naturally, being the caring soul that she is, she wanted to help and set out to do just that. She agreed to babysit for her new friend. Her friend has an 8 year old daughter and Georgia's soon to be 4 year old daughter was excited to have a new playmate that wasn't her twin brother. According to Georgia the child is sweet and well behaved. Sitting for her doesn't seem to be a problem at least not when taken at face value. However when looking at the grand scheme of things the picture tends to blur a little.

The issue isn't the child but the mother. Now granted I'm about to judge someone that I don't know personally and that has never done anything to me but . . . but! from the little bit I've found out about her I have a very uncomfortable feeling for the situation. What follows are my observations and concerns.

  • The woman works evening hours. The little girl stays with Georgia from around 3:00pm until 10:30pm or later.
    • This disrupts an already precarious evening schedule for Georgia and the twins.
  • The woman seems somewhat unreliable to me at best.
    • Maybe I just have trust issues but something doesn't sit right with me about her.
  • I question the overall welfare of the child.
    • What kind of mother chooses a complete stranger to sit their child without doing and background research?
    • On either the first or second day of sitting Georgia had a dentist appointment. She asked her brother to sit with the children while she was out. She informed the mother of the situation and explained that the kids would be with her brother until she could finish with the dentist and return home. The mother didn't have any issue with these arrangements. Once again I ask what kind of mother would do this sort of thing?
    • Tonight the mother's schedule was supposed to be until 7:00pm. Tonight when she came to pick the child up she tried to get Georgia to go out with her and see if her brother would watch the kids when he got home from work (He gets home around 11:00pm). When Georgia said maybe some other time the woman asked her if she would keep the little girl while she went out. Georgia did . . .


All of this brings me to where I am tonight and the real point of this post, heart or mind? Georgia didn't get in any trouble for any of this other than missing her lights out curfew. However I was upset at the circumstances and the position she put herself into. I have several issues with all of this:
  • Georgia should have set well defined boundaries governing the following:
    • Drop off time. (Specific)
    • Pick up time. (Specific)
I personally believe she should not have agree to watch the little girl for her mom to go out and party. However with that said since she did agree she should have once again defined the boundaries:
  • Pick up time. (Specific)
  • Where the mother was going. (Specific)


As of midnight the little girl was still asleep on the sofa, Georgia had missed her curfew and I had a very uneasy feeling about the entire arrangement. I'm chalking this one up to a lesson in following one's heart. Georgia has a very large , loving, and compassionate heart. I know that all she saw was a child in need and not a selfish "mother" that seems to have a total disregard for her responsibilities as a parent. And for that I can accept a lack of judgement on her part. That said, I think I made it pretty clear to her that repeats wouldn't be handled so generously in the future. From now own I expect her to set boundaries and to be firm in holding to them. If not she will be in for more than just a reprimand and I'm not sure how much she'd enjoy feeling nausea as well as a stinging hot ass.

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